~pommegenozide

Thanks for all the people who encouraged me, who tried to help me, who showed me that I'm not alone ... even if I don't have you within my sight or my reach, I know you guys/gals are there... emotions could be so dangerous but I've found my resolution...

I will continue to "believe" as I always do... now I'm almost back on my feet, and my answer for my life is that I will not stop believing, I won't stop my faith ... even though what lies ahead might be my failure again and again. Even though it might seems like nobody sees my significance, I just have to keep fighting. Because deep down inside I know many people care, in fact the one who brought me down the most was myself.

So if I want to progress on the path to my future , I just have to know which enemy to aim at. Which enemy to strike... and that enemy is the reflection of my own self. I don't usually see him since he's perfectly blended with me, the only difference is that the axis of his heart is totally opposite from mines. He generates "hatred and despair" when I have faith in "love and hope". He desires to bring me down... but if I don't give in, he would never win. The only one who can stop this reincarnation of madness is myself, and this time I believe that I can.

Dear people who always try and fight the best that you can... I want to share this with you ... "Even if we might have different destinations, even if we might dream different dreams, even if our fates cross each other and even if we have to aim our blades against each other's throats... we just have to fight as hard as we can and have no regret about the actions we chose."

Even if we're different, I still hope we could all have faith in what we believe and reach for our dreams.
As long as you do your best, know that you've got me ... as a fellow DREAMER and FIGHTER.

Cheers to all,

Pomme, signing off

--
[link]

<sup>ความเชื่อ - BELIEF
มันเกือบจะล้มมันเหนื่อยมันล้าเหมือนแทบขาดใจ
I almost fall because of tiredness, despair starts consuming my heart.

เดินมาจนท้อไม่เจอจุดหมายปลายทางที่ฝัน
I walk until being discouraged but still not finding the destination of my dream.

จะกลับได้ไหมถ้าเดินต่อไปยากเย็นขนาดนั้น ยังถามใจ
Is it possible to turn back if walking on is that much difficult, I still ask myself.

ตลอดชีวิตฉันเชื่อในสิ่งที่คิด หรือมันจะเป็นอะไรที่ผิด และฉันเองที่หลงทาง?
Throughout my life I believe in my faith, or is it wrong? Am I just lost? Am I being stupid?

ชีวิตมันต้องเดินตามหาความฝัน หกล้มคลุกคลานเท่าไหร่
Life, is to follow your dreams. No matter how many times you fall.

มันจะไปจบที่ตรงไหน เมื่อเดินเท่าไหร่มันก็ไปไม่ถึง
Wherever it would end? I keep asking since all I see is endless path.

เดินต่อช้าๆไม่อยากปล่อยฝันให้มันหลุดมือ
Walk on slowly because I don't want my dream to slip from my hands.

ที่สั่งให้ฉันไปต่อก็คือความเชื่อเท่านั้น
That which keeps me going is only faith alone.

แค่ในวันนี้เรี่ยวแรงยังเหลือก็ยังต้องฝัน ต้องก้าวไป
Even today, with the strength still left, then still there should be dream, should walk on

ตลอดชีวิตฉันเชื่อในสิ่งที่คิด แม้ไม่ว่ามันจะถูกหรือผิด จะขอทำสุดหัวใจ!
I'll keep my faith for all my life. No matter if it's right or wrong, I Don't care anymore because I just have to put all my heart and effort.

------

ชีวิตมันต้องเดินตามหาความฝัน หกล้มคลุกคลานเท่าไหร่
Life, is to follow your dreams. No matter how many times you fall.

มันจะไปจบที่ตรงไหน แต่จะยังไงก็ต้องไปให้ถึง
Where will this road end? I don't care anymore since all I need to do is to find the destination.

ที่สุดถ้ามันจะไม่คุ้ม แต่มันก็ดีที่อย่างน้อย ได้จดจำว่าครั้งนึงเคยก้าวไป
At the end, even if my efforts would become worthless. I'd still be proud to know that I've tried to walk forward.

แค่คนที่เชื่อในความฝัน จะเหน็ดจะเหนื่อยก็ยังต้องเดินต่อไป
Only person who have faith and dream will keep walking no matter how tiring it is.
------

ฉันท้อแท้สักกี่ทียังมีหวัง
Despair would never destroy my hope and would never bring me down.

แม้พลาดพลั้งสักกี่ครั้งยังฝันไกล
How many time I blundered, I'll keep dreaming.

แม้ฉันล้มฉันก็คงไม่ตาย ฉันยังไม่ตายฉันยังคงหายใจ
Even though I fell, I wouldn't die ... I will not die, I'm still breathing.

แม้ท้อแท้สักกี่ทียังมีหวัง
Despair would never destroy my hope and would never bring me down.

แม้พลาดพลั้งสักกี่ครั้งยังฝันไกล
How many time I blundered, I'll keep dreaming.

แม้ฉันล้มฉันก็คงไม่ตาย ฉันยังไม่ตายฉันยังคงหายใจ
Even though I fell, I wouldn't die ... I will not die, I'm still breathing.</sup>

I know... not that I'm bragging about myself... but I do know that I'm a person with good nature ...

But sometimes the inevitable question keeps hitting my head , why have compassion for others when they always hurt me? Why have faith in people, in love, in society when all other did was trying to use me ... stepping over my head just to reach what they desire, why should I have faith?

Shouldn't it be better if I could just change my view of this world, change my view for others, take what I can and destroy others while I have chance? Isn't that the way I can get even?

Why love others when all they do is caring about themselves?

Why be nice to them when they never see you?

Why... why?

I don't know what to do and what to feel anymore, this time I really don't.

I wish I could be a harsher person ... my compassion for other is the bringer of despair, the darkest pit which will devour my sanity.

Or may be I'm already insane since I always care about people's feeling... I don't know anymore

I'm losing faith even for myself ... pathetic I know... pathetic.

I know wishing to be harsher is just big talk ... I know myself too well ... it's just another hopeless wish, at the end of the day I'm still the one who's there for other to take advantage of...

Pathetic me...

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MESSAGE FROM ME

For all those who came to see my works as well as leaving your comments/watches.
Thank you for all your support

Cheers,
Pomme

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MYSTERIOUS CLOCK?!

CLICK CLICK CLICK!!!!

Mysterious? Not so ... Chrono Trigger is coming to DS! Beside from that countdown page ... I still don't have a clue what would it be like? A total remake customized for the DS, or a complete new experience...?

This may sounds funny coming from a 3D person , but personally I love to play 2D games ... like the old FFs and Suikodens (even Akumajo Dracula/ Castlevania) ... but considering we're living in this "Matrix era" and new breed of gamers (who grew dumber everyday as I can see) , the more advanced graphics = the better game ... booooo! New-school gamers don't even understand that a great game is a big composition of Arts, Writings, Sounds and Funs. Yes... good graphic is a plus, but without good stories or fun factors or decent melodies, those games are just programs.

It's not that I think all 3D stuffs are bad and stick to my old-school-ness, but somethings have their charms when they were once released in 2D... so I just wish they could bring out new charms by enhancing the sprites rather than just reproduce things in 3D (like FFIII and FFIV for DS) ... I know 3D use less labor and money than making 2D arts, but what the hey! Koji Igarashi is still making 2D Castlevania series... and they always ROCK! ... And I'd still watch Doraemon, Hokuto no ken, Sleeping Beauty, Sword in the Stone, etc. in 2D rather than the 3D remakes (if they decided to ruin these great shows

We'll see how will the DS version of Chrono Trigger turn out...

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██ POMME NEEDS HELP WITH ANIME ███

Anyone could help me find the complete box-set ( with English subs ) of this anime ---> [link] (link? or any place which could possibly deliver to Canada) ... I heard someone saw it in Japan with price tag of more than 300$ (That's crazy!) ... I know it's a hopeless request, but I'm considering making a textured and posed 3D model of your choice as a reward if you can help me get it (with reasonable price T_T )

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S.T.A.T.U.S.

--HEALTH--:
CREATIVITY:
--EFFORT--:

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█ ██ ███ H.O.B.O. Team ███ ██ █


HENTAI- OTAKU- BAKA- OGAMA(?!)

FEATURE!!!

made this piece for Earth Day, [link] , I missed it though. Just watched it and it ROCKS! No bullshit, just go take a look by yourselves.

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MGS4 : Wait Till Free !!

<sub>No more being a lazy ass, now I'm creating something in 3D, I don't even have an urge to play my new Metal Gear 4, I let it sit there collecting dust along with my PS3 Actually I feel so good when I have a sense of purpose to make something.

Why 3D? because my drawing skill still need loads of practices and torments. Anyway I might have something to show quite soon.</sub>

MANGA

<sub>Anyone here read Soul Eater? I kinda love the stylized proportion in this manga.

Normally I will go for mangas with sketchy linearts and old school techniques like "Testarotho","Aegis in the dark","Shin Megami Tensei" or super clean mangas like Morinaga-sensei's stuffs (Yamadataro) or Yonehara-sensei's book (Coco-full ahead, Switch) ... or school-boys fighting mangas like "Crows","Worst","Again","Battle Fish"

Believe me I've read a lot of "cool" mangas back at home, but sometimes I found myself reading a little bit less serious-looking manga with stylized designs and weird perspectives like One-piece, Caramel Ringo, Rave Master ... usuall they're action-packed and sometimes has better stories than the look of themselves. Soul Eater falls into this category also, manga which at first looked like stupid but turned into something super fun, nice arts and awesome pacing ... Sqaure-Enix even bought the license of this manga to make into a action game. (but we'll have to judge the game itself later)

If you're into One-piece or the alikes, may be you'll like Soul Eater too ^^</sub>

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S.T.A.T.U.S.

--HEALTH--:
CREATIVITY:
--EFFORT--:

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█ ██ ███ H.O.B.O. Team ███ ██ █


HENTAI- OTAKU- BAKA- OGAMA(?!)

█ ██ Metal Gear Solid 4 : Wait Till Friday? ██ █ (UPDATED)

I've just got MGS4 (Limited Edition)today from the legendary EBGames, apparently the shop at Metrotown (Vancouver, CAN) never treated me like all the rumors I've heard.

Anyway, it's tempting but I don't know whether I should start playing it tonight. Since I've got some ideas I wanna draw and also I just bought book 14 of Mushashi#9 (by Takahashi Miyuki) that I've been waiting for ages. I got the game because they will hold pre-order for only 2 days then they will sell it to other people. So it left me no choice but to go get it after work.

May be I'm not nerdy or crazy as I used to be, but now I view gaming as personal experience (except online or multi-player games), especially RPG or games with good stories. I think it's better to sit down, relax and enjoy it on weekend (like a good wine or sake) rather than staying up all Thursday night trying to play and go as far as you can (so you can try to spoil the fun of your friends who haven't got as far as you/ or get spoiled by friends who're crazier than you)and ruin your work (or your mood because lack of sleep/ or spoilers)on the next day.

Well, getting older means a lot of things. Now I still enjoy games and mangas (don't even think about talking RPG to me if you only know FF or KH), but I do it with more responsibility.

I DO HAVE A LIFE!!

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█ ALMOST THE END OF HIBERNATING █

Okay, I've decided to start doing something again...
The last concept I was talking about, I'm polishing it and would be seen soon (I mean real soon this time)

There's nothing one can achieve by sitting and being depressed, I'll fight!

No attention, I don't really care now, what good would it be to get surrounded by c*ck-suckers? Just a handful of nice people who really appreciate my stuffs would be more than enough.

█ HEALTH!! █
One more thing, I've been on short vacation for 3 weeks due to no work at all. During that time, I went to gym and jogging... Lost around 4 Kg and grow muscle now. Who says nerd have to look ugly? Even our hobbies have many people associated us to stereotypical bad looking people portrayed in medias, we can shake those image away ... I'm not saying we should all aim for skinny or muscular celebrities as our goal. Just take a little more care of ourselves, our appearances and we will look good, or even better than a lot of "non-nerd" people. Cheers

█ EXTRA █

Thanks a bunch for your message, I'm still alive... my bad for not replying your mail, I was just being an asshole. But do know that I really appreciate when people give me their support. (Also I checked your stuffs, just didn't give any comment... I will go back real soon)


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My Real-Life Gang! H.O.B.O. Team


HENTAI- OTAKU- BAKA- OGAMA(?!)


My Special Thanks!



You guys/gals are awesome people also!